waiting is the hardest part

As I write this I am waiting to hear from my big brother. Him and his wife are having their first baby today. This is my first niece/nephew. For my parents it's grandbaby #5. I am so excited for them and me as well. So here I sit, waiting. Waiting is tough. But it brings about great rewards. My brother opted not to find out the gender of the baby. This makes me so happy, I find it all the more exciting to not know. For my own children the first two I did not find out. The excitement of it all was fantastic. When will they make their arrival, will I be gifted with a son or daughter, what will they look like? I got so excited with each one at it was all worth the wait. Now when I got pregnant with the twins I "had to find out" it was all too overwhelming. You know what? It took away some of that magic. We named them before they were born, and we referred to them as the boys, but the excitement of unknowing was gone.

When I was a kid I used to snoop to find out what we were getting for Christmas. Sometimes I found things other times I didn't. As I got older, I got smarter. I realized that knowing wasn't any fun. That guessing and not knowing was more fun. I still flirt with trying to figure things out, but deep down I don't want to know until the time is right. This year on Christmas morning there was the big box, and my sisters and I were speculating whose it was and who it was for (my parents don't do name tags). So while I wanted to know before we started, I didn't pry to hard. I figured it was something for my brother and the new baby, guessing it was baby gear (which comes in huge boxes). It turns out I was wrong, the box was for Paul and I. My parents bought us a new TV. And we were totally shocked and thrilled with such a nice gift. Surprises are fun and good.

There are other things that I am waiting for too. Last night I ordered a new computer. Currently I have an ibook G4 and I love it. However, it's older and slower than I would like. So I ordered a refurbished desktop MAC. This will become the family computer. Not only will I have all the updated photo software, but I will be able to do more with the kids. I can buy some software for them to teach them typing skills and let them play games from time to time.

In other news, this coming Monday a real estate agent is coming to assess our house. Again I must wait until Monday, but that afternoon we will begin the process of selling our house and shopping for a new one. This is all so very exciting and overwhelming at the same time. I keep looking at the mountains of possessions we will have to pack or purge. I'm overwhelmed by the amount of work will go into getting this house market ready. I am overwhelmed by the daunting task of house hunting. And yet, I am excited by the notion of change. A new house means a new place to live. Something to make my own. We don't plan on going far from where we are, but that doesn't make it any less different. The biggest change of all will be going from the city life of shared walls, cramped backyards and walking to church, school and doctors, to a more suburban life. It will certainly be a huge adjustment. Again I am so very excited about this unknown adventure that lies before us. And I have to wait several days for it all to begin.

So I'm going to go do more laundry and feed the kiddies lunch all in an attempt to pass the time while I wait.

A Quick Vent

I hate potty training. Hate it. Hate it. Hate it.

When Catherine turned two I was preggo with Stephen. I started that summer with training her and quickly gave up. It turns out bending over to mop up messes was really tricking 6-9mos pregnant. At some point after Steve was born I tried again and by the time she was 3 we were done. She was night trained the summer she turned 3.

I waited longer with Steve. Having two babies 10 months behind him made me think twice about this ordeal. The summer he was about to turn 3 (he's an August baby). I gave it a shot. At first he was on board. Then he wasn't. I let him run in t-shirts and underpants. I let him pick the underpants. I stopped and started a lot with him. Until I finally relized he didn't like sitting. I taught him to stand. Bingo! done. Mostly. We started training Steve because he was waking up every morning with wet clothes. The extra laundry was anoying so I started making him go on the toilet before bed. This resulted in him being night trained before anything else. Shortly after he turned 3 he started pre-school and by the end of September or so he was done.

The twins turned 3 in June. So I started working on them this summer. After some trial and error I realized I had to do one child at a time or I would go insane. Josh showed promise so I went at it full on with him. If David showed any interest I would oblige but I wouldn't force it with him like I would with Josh. (when I potty train I don't use pull-ups, just underpants) For a week or two things were looking good and then I hit a wall. Accidents started happening and Josh just didn't care. So I stopped and decided to wait him out.

In the meantime, David started to express real interest. The first few attempts were total failures. But waiting for David to be ready was the best thing ever. Because by the end of the first week he was just about done. After a few setbacks and hurdles we got the job done. After a month or two he came to me and said I don't want to wear pull-ups to bed. I told him he had to wake up dry. He did. And I let him wear underpants to bed. Since then he's had three bedtime accidents and that's it.

Now Joshua. I decided a while back that I was done. No more diaper changes. No more pull-ups. I'm sick of it. So I came down on Joshua. More than a month (almost 2) later he's still not even close to done. The worst part is that he doesn't care. One day a week ago he cried when I told him I was putting on a pull-up to go out for a long trip. So I relented and let him have the underpants. He stayed dry until we got home. Then he had the accident on the way to the bathroom.

Today he made a royal mess. It took a long time to clean up. I was mad enough that he sat naked in an empty bathtub while I cleaned the carpet. He's clean now. And so are the clothes, tub and floor... but lesson learned? doubtful... Over the weekend he had a wet accident and in the process of cleaning himself up he took a nap. Again he didn't bother to tell me that he made a mess and he tried to fix it himself. He got tired and climbed into bed, naked, and took a nap. I found him later sleeping in bed, with no clothes on.

It hasn't been fun. Potty training. I hate it. I will be singing high praises when it is all done.

Christmas in the Air

Advent is rapidly coming to a close. It is apparent in so many ways. My Lego Calendar is nearly complete. The boys have been loving this treat. Every day since December 1 we have opened one window. Each day they get a new Lego piece to put together. They spend hours in front of this rickety table playing with the Legos. We have lost a few pieces and hopefully they will turn up.

Other proof that Advent is nearly over is the growing number of handmade ornaments on our tree. This year Catherine and I have been working on the Jesse Tree. Each day we have a Bible reading, each reading has a symbol which gets hung on the tree. So with the traditional Christmas balls, and first Christmas ornaments we have a technicolor coat, apple with a snake, lion and lamb... It's really fun to be reminded of these great stories. It has

also opened a side of Catherine I never expected. She loves reading from the Bible. So much so that I had to promise to buy her one for Christmas. I wrapped it last night. I wanted to inscribe something in it but was at loss for words. Maybe after Christmas I'll go in and highlight my favorite passage (1 Cor 10:13).

My Christmas shopping is done, but the wrapping is not. The last few days I have started the wrapping. I don't hide from the kids the stuff that is not for them. So the family gifts are nearly done. Last night Paul and I took care of Catherine's and Joshua's gifts. It's fun yet tedious to wrap. I just keep thinking the hours put in to wrapping will be undone within minutes.

Our baking is also nearly done. We have huge storage boxes filled with cookies and I

think Paul is considering making a few more batches. I also do gift jars every year. It's a great way to knock out teachers, neighbors, and some extended family too. They are simple gifts that are cheap to make and always appreciated. Every year I pick out a few recipes and set up shop. The kids get to help putting the ingredients in as well. It gives them a sense of ownership when handing over the gifts to various people. Among the recipes this year was a cookie that uses four kinds of chips. It looks yummy and I look forward to actually cooking a batch. A few years back I handed out a recipe that is a chocolate chip oatmeal cookie. We make those now every year as part of our Christmas cookies to give away. It's really yummy.

Anyway... I love Advent for all that it is. All those preparations, the anticipation I love it. I love getting ready. Getting ready for Jesus, without whom would I be here? Would I be who I am? Getting ready for fun times with the family. I'm ready. The candles are lit. The decorations are up. The gifts are bought. A few more days and it's celebration time. And if we are being truly honest. The best celebration will come just a few days after Christmas for me this year. My brother and sister-in-law are due soon with their first baby. This brings me great joy. I will be an Aunt for the first time. My kids will have a baby cousin to adore for the first time. Truly this Christmas Season will rock. (Even if my kids keep the annual tradition of getting sick at Christmas)

Confession and The Cold

I went to Confession today. When I go I really should pack layers. See When I am cold I wear layers. Lot's of layers. And It's wintery so it's cold. Really cold.

When I get nervous one of two things will happen. 1. I get hot and sweaty. 2. I get sick.

I always get nervous before confession. I don't know why I just do. So todays nerves showed in the hot and sweaty variety. This is fairly typical.

If I could I'd prefer to show up in shorts and a tank top. I'm that hot and sweaty. I'd like to have a bag of clothes at my feet.

The thing is once I get started I start to cool off. So I'll add the long pants. Drop a few more sins and the palms stop sweating. Add the long sleeve tee. Go through the council add socks and boots. Pray my Act of Contrition I can put on the vest. Receive Absolution. On come the hat, scarf, gloves, coat. I'm freezing cold again.

I'm going to try it

I've been thinking about Blogging. A lot of my friends are doing it. So I figure, why not give it a try??

Fair warning: My grammar is terrible. My thoughts will ramble, they may even be incoherent at times. That's just the way it is. I try my best, and that's all you can ask for.